Sleep, Sleep and more sleep!!

I'm exhausted!  My day goes like this:

10.00 am Try and get up!  Usually takes about an hour.

11.00 am Walk dogs.

12.00 noon Rush of to hospital for radiotherapy.  Popping in on beautiful sister and Lotty the  the adorable baby with more hair than me!

2.00 pm Home, lunch, bed.

7.00 pm Get up, eat supper.  Sit on sofa like lump of lifeless lard.

9.00 pm Go to bed!

Its fashion week and all my facebook friends are going to all the wonderful shows and parties. They then ring me to tell me what fun they are having.  Also lovely Eric actually managed to send me a couple of photos showing what fun he's having!  Thanks darling.  Just received another party invite! I'm consoling myself with dreams of when its all over.

This sleeping thing has only just started.  I did have the most amazing weekend.  Ian (who makes beautiful handmade corsets)  had a birthday party on Saturday.  I took naughty daughter as she did an apprenticeship with him and loves him.  I also took lovely boy I've been kissing.  I was driving as the party was miles away in north London.  On the way we picked up my old school friend Katie.  When we get there it was brilliant.  My lovely Mary was there from Devon, looking wonderful as well as loads of old friends.  Half way through the party Katie turned to me and asked:

 "was there not someone coming who you have been kissing?".  

"Darling" I said "he's the one who was in the car with us"

"Oh" she said"I thought he was Rosie's (naughty daughter's) boyfriend".

Well what could I say!!!  anyway the outcome is that I'm going to take things no further with beautiful boy.  He is very sweet but I think we are going to stop kissing and just be friends from now on.  Don't think he was very impressed with being thought of as boyfriend of naughty daughter either.  Especially as she was being totally vile to him!

Sunday was The club's Christmas party (we have to do it now as we are so busy at Christmas).  The theme was Beach Party.  Before that I cooked a Sunday roast for my elegant sister-in-law and my beautiful but very naughty niece and nephew.  Beautiful boy was also there and again sister-in-law thought he was a friend of the kids!! When I'm well and have my figure back I'm going to find a nice sensible man of my own age.  I never want to be one of those middle aged ladies that has a selection of toy boys on her arm!  

Then onto the club.  Naughty daughter had friends with her one of whom had a nicer car than me!  And drove us there.  I was in the front with a very beautiful Chanel bag on my lap!  Not mine hers!!  By then I was quite tired.  Then got rather drunk and made best friends with a woman that owns a fetish hotel!!!  Oops!!  One of my favourite work mates, Jim was miserable because he's homeless.  Yes you've guessed we have a new member of our family.  He's turning out to be very easy.  Tonight he's in Brighton having a romantic night with a Fuel Girl. My only tiny worry is that he does have the most dreadful reputation as a seducer and I'm worried he might jump on naughty daughter when she's drunk!!  Well on the way home from the party on Saturday she (with rather a lot of wine in her) declared that she was very good in bed.  Lordy how to make a Mother's ears bleed!

Well I'm signing off now as it's almost my bed time.

Love from lifeless lump of lard.

xxx

Happy!

Oh my God!

I'm so so happy!  I don't think I have ever felt as happy as I am now!

REASON 1

I've hooked up with an old gang of friends.  They all know me so well that life is so easy.   They totally accept my bald state and are brilliant.  Tonight I've been to my beloved Jamie's exhibition at 'Trash Palace.  It was so much fun, I was so happy to see so many old faces from my past.

REASON 2

I'm through with Chemo and Radiotherapy is just a walk in the park compared.

REASON 3

I've been offered the most amazing job.

REASON 4

I've just had the most amazing news re finances.  

REASON 5

I'm killing the cancer beast!!!!

REASON 6

I'm going to Spain with my 2 best friends in the beginning of October.  Can't wait!

REASON 7

I love my children! (this should be reason 1)

And I can go on and on and on!!!  Basically life is wonderful.

xxxxxx

Update!

Silly depression has gone.  actually I'm feeling happier than I have for ages.  I've started my radiotherapy and its so so easy after chemo.  Although I've discovered the love of sleep.  I'm sleeping loads and loving it, also having the most amazing dreams.

Between sleeping I've been very busy.  I'm going to be photographed by Gozra tomorrow.  Gozra is the most amazing photographer, he's been in Vogue, and more.  Google him!  Anyway its for a book on beauty and I'm going to be in it!!!  I'l post the picture after.

Also I've managed another kiss with beautiful boy!  We went for a drink last week and I so remember the kiss this time!  It was so so lovely.  He is very cool and I know we will be great friends.  Sadly one of the throwbacks from chemo is the total lack of desire so I'm not in the leas bit interested in taking things further at the moment.  Although I'm probably flattering myself if I think he would!

Sad news is the fact that my lovely club is being closed down in January so I'll be out of a job.  Although I've been offered 4 jobs and one of them is amazing.  I'll let you know when I have conformation that It's all on!!  I'm not going to say anything now as I might jinx it!!

So all is very well at the moment for me.

Kisses.

xxxxxx

Lottie Heffron

This is my new niece Lottie.  Beautiful sister is very pissed of that I have not mentioned her before but to be honest I'm slightly pissed off that Lottie has more hair than me!

Actually she is very very lovely and I'm slightly in love with her.

Me and some of the boys from work!

These pictures were taken on a brilliant night out with my lovely Jamie.  So sad he's not in any!  Below is me with Richard who does not actually work with us.  He's part of a cabaret act called Dikkie and Dolly.  I think he was once a contestant on Big Brother.  The other character is Andy who I work with and love dearly, despite the fact that he is a grumpy old sod.

This picture is of me, Andy again and Kurt who works behind our bar as well as being in an incredibly cool band.  

Mrs T's lovely home

I had a lovely weekend at Mrs T's house.  She has the most beautiful home in a lovely valley in Somerset.  I have to say I was not feeling 100% and she looked after me so beautifully.  I only wish I was a lovely to her when she had the dreaded cancer.

One thing we did agree on is that chemo is totally vile!  Without a doubt the nastiest thing either of us has ever done.  Far far worse than having babies!  I did ask her why she did not tell me how horrid it was going to be.  She just smiled and said why would she?  And would it have helped.  Which is very true.  In fact if I'd know I probably would have run away long before the end.

Its funny because I was so looking forward to this week as it is the week before chemo, if I was still doing it and I was so looking forward to Friday and knowing I'm not off to chemo, but in reality I'm feeling very low.  I have no idea why as my hair is coming back and life is moving on.  I think it might be something to do with the chemicals that have been left behind.  I'm not the type of person who gets depression but boy am I feeling rough right now.  In and ideal world I'd be at home in bed crying.  Thank god I have a job that forces me to go to work although I'm not my usual happy self.  I can't seem to get excited about gossip or the fact that I've managed to bring in a huge event.  Normally a day like today would have me dancing around the office whereas in reality all I want to do is go home.

I really want to write about the lovely weekend but I'm not in the mood to write about a fun time so think I'll come back to it once this dark cloud has lifted.

Phew!

The last chemo is all over and I'm back to my old self!  Well until Radiotherapy starts in September.

I've had the most amazing adventures but due to people who read this blog I can't tell the whole story.  There have been some hysterical moments and some incredibly frustrating and irritating times. 

Funny moments such as two bald ladies shivering with fear while hiding in a Shorditch pub's beer garden with two huge suitcases (helping a friend leave psychotic boyfriend).

Having to steal my own car!  I kid you not!  Again a long story that I can't really tell.

Hoping I was kissed by the most beautiful man.  As Polly said "Thank god darling, someone pretty at long last".  Believe me their  have been some shockers!   I'm not totally sure if we did kiss as lovely boss had bought me too many cocktails.   Frankly can't see why pretty boy would want to kiss bloated, bald, middle aged woman but I'm living in hope!  Or am I?  If I was kissed I can't remember so might as well have not been!   Anyway he was divine.  Half native American and very rock and roll.  I'm jut going to pretend I was kissed.

Being told off by a grown adult because I'd thrown Mr Bongabonga in the bin!!  I kid you not! To be honest I have not idea who or what Mr bongabonga is and I have no recollection of throwing him/it in the bin.  Also being told of by neighbours because an unwanted guest turned up in middle of night on extremely noisy motorbike, then proceeded to make a huge fuss outside the house before driving off on extremely noisy motorbike.

I'm off to Somerset this weekend to stay with the infamous Mrs T  Hopefully she'll give me some more really useful tips on how to cope with cancer!  If so I'll be sure to pass them on to you dear reader.  for now I'll say good bye and enjoy the lovely English Summer!